show me the way ;

11/29/2006

~ 2:49 PM ~

Is it true that when one's in love,he/she tends to be away from friends?

I can feel that .. a moment of solemn.. alone.. away from a lot of friends... people tend to think that the person in love can just be in a world filled with fairytales with him can le.. but i think it shouldn't be like this.. Admit that i have been rather engrossed with him, purely because i can only see him once a week.. the kind of feeling of missing him is sometimes uncontrollable.. although i tend to advise my friends to give their partners more freedom.. however i felt that i am beginning to become selfish and occupying his freedom.. know why? because my mind is filled with "can you don't meet ya friends" kinda thoughts whenever he say he meeting friends when when when bla bla bla.. thats y i am beginning to fear.. rationally, i know i must give him freedom and i know he loves freedom.. but on the other side, if i don't tell him about all these restrictions and unhappiness i feel inside my heart.. i felt that i am not truthful enough in front of him.. **bang Serene's head** ..

so i shan't not have such thoughts.. and that is why i decide to go camping which is next friday.. gonna be super enthu about it and enjoy myself thoroughly and also giving him the freedom and time to spend with his friends.. yup yup.. haix.. see!! here comes my sighing again.. and back to my subject.. i love my friends and i know they love me too.. having lived in this world for 19 years that made me realised that friends and loved ones are the only part and parcel of life which is most important to me.. studying is useless.. or should i rephrase? studying is a process of growing up.. but the ultimate aim is to enjoy life.. thinking about the word life.. oh gosh.. i so so long never enjoy life le.. ahh!!.. okie la.. enough of my life thoery and my reflections..

updates about this week.. geesh!! he is having fieldcamp again for the third week.. to hell with the sergeants.. opps =x .. and yesh i am gonna meet him on Sat to go on a fun trip.. Sentosa!!.. he is so so nice to be so so obliging to accompany me there when i request to go.. and yesh.. i had made plans on wad to do .. the list starts like dat.. morning he come fetch me at 9.30am.. then we shall have breakfast and then head off to harbourfront via NEL.. and then take a bus in (haha.. to save money..) and go in.. our first stop will be the underwater world where fishes fishes.. it has been ages since i last enter although i used to enter numerous times when i was a child and i tink nth has changed.. but rite.. this first stop is subject to changes.. cos we may go fort siloso instead.. okie.. second stop shall be the luge ride with the sky train i tink.. hmm hope that the weather's good and i can get a good tan but before this we might have our luchie first at sakae sushi.. after the rides.. we will proceed to merlion which he insists on going.. dunno wads nice about it.. haha. he wanna climb to the top la.. geesh.. if it is too high.. he gonna piggy back mi man!! (opps.. =x dun tell him first lest he changes his mind).. next next is our dolphin lagoon.. dolphins.. pink ones.. actually not reali interested just that it comes in a package with underwater world.. lol.. next next is to rush to palawan beach.. yoo hoo.. to watch sunset.. hmm.. he loves sunset too.. aww.. guess it is gonna be spectacular unless the rain wanna spoil my plan.. then tan tan.. maybe tanning at 3 over there.. see how.. then rite.. bad news bad news.. he just told me on Monday la.. at night he may have to rush over to have a birthday dinner with his clique .. hmm.. thats a maybe.. and he cant confirm with me as he say his clique is always very last minute one -_-" but rite.. he said "may cancel it.. haha.. to pei u".. and i kindly said " up to u to decide.. if u have to go for birthdae celebration.. just go bah".. wah!! since when am i so kind.. haha.. up to him bah.. but my wish is of cos to ________. (suppose to be a closed secret and we shall see what he decides) there goes a day and i am so so gonna miss him after that cos the following i will be having camps and next next week will be pa la la birthdae celebration.. hmm.. but i tink the next next week i will try to meet up with him.. heh.. secretly though!! shhhhhhzzzzz! .. and then next next next week will be tada!! x mas eve dinner with him.. awwww and come to think of it.. i have thought of the present unless the plan that i intend to.. haha.. (friends ...date mi out to buy his present.. ) yup yup.. thats about it.. saying that i will oni update this week and now i talk about three weeks later things.. ahha..okie

till now thats all..

=

11/15/2006

~ 9:52 AM ~

Hmm..

Like my title says.. this week is dull.. maybe because of his absence.
There is this saying "Absence makes the heart grow fonder". Don't
ever underestimate this statement. It is real true. Everyday after
work / school, he will always be on my mind, thinking about how he
is doing, kena burnt, become a red lobster, fall sick and whatever bad
things that can happen to him. Haha.. I am going on the extreme side
of "hua-chiing" already. That's bad. *Kok Kok Serene's head* And
right, he is getting sweeter.. really sweet.. sometimes i don't even know
that's for real or just a humour. All I know is that i am comfortable
whenever i am out with him. You know.. it is not the physical moments
that i am with him but just the little care and concern from him and the
smiles and the feel that is important. He makes me feel loved and he makes
me feel like Serene. I must stressed.. He really makes me feel like Serene..
Tolerating all my nonsense.. all my childish acts.. all my whining.. all my
bubbly acts.. all my hyper acts..all of me.. and of course all of Serene.. be it
she is fat, thin, pretty, ugly, long hair, short hair, glam, unglam and ALL.. haha..
that's what that makes him attractive afterall.. i used to change for a person..
somehow he has the power to make me change for him.. i thought i would be
happy, seeing him happy for the changes i have ade for him.. but i am wrong i
guess. i was never this happy.. always thinking of how much more i should improve
on myself to become more attractive.. that period was quite sad.. i tried to
exercise everyday, took up aerobics, learn dancing, control my diet and tried all
ways... for a start, i was rather determined but as time goes by, i felt that it ain't
Serene anymore.. the cheerful and bubbly girl has turned into a sulky girl.. because
i am always wondering why the guy i used to like always wants a better change in
me.. i just don't seem to understand what's the point of being perfect .. i am always
discouraged by the many flaws pointed out by him that i lost all my confidence in
myself.. Qi told me " Serene.. finally u understand the meaning of not regretting to
love someone who may not be with you forever".. and yesh.. i have understood.. the
real meaning of being once cherished and loved and not thinking of a forever love..
Haha.. enough said.. I miss him so much and he is still in fieldcamp.. Gosh.. haha.. tata!

"Our love grows stronger"

=)

11/09/2006

~ 2:23 PM ~

Hai..

Is it always true that when you are sorta in love that you will lose your focus and concentration? It has been prven for me as I have not been seriously studying these few days. I felt sinful and gulity towards my books. Is not that i don't wanna study, it is just that i have lost my fighting spirit to LOVE. I have always been like that since i started my first relationship. That is also to say I can't multi task. The feeling is good when you get to go out with the one you love and the companion alone is enough to bring smiles to you all day and night. Heh... But but.. true enough, serene has to get back to her studies le.. oh ya.. going on holidays soon in December.. Can't wait as that is a lot of programmes lining up.. Especially the Xmas Eve Dinner with him which i am still thinking of what present to give him.. Any one with ideas, please feel free to tell me or even better, shop with me for them.. Seriously i don't know how to buy presents for guys de.. Cos they are quite picky at times.. hee..

Back to studies...

"Time waits for no man"

=)